with all emotions set aside, in a whisper say goodbye

Stephanie Tang, i really hope you do read this one day. Preferably sooner then later.

One of the consequences of joining the Australian Defence Force and attending the Australian Defence Force Academy is the potential to die in combat or even training, another consequence of this choice in life is the fact that i would have to move Canberra in order to attend the Academy. This is something i have come to understand and accepted.

However i understand it may be difficult for some of my close friends and "family" (i really do consider some of you guys family, even though we have no blood relation) to understand and accept this. I first realised this when Alice confronted me and said "I don't want you to join ADF, i don't want you to die". This does mean a lot to me Alice, you were the first person to say this to me and because it came from you, it does make me realise what i am leaving behind when i leave. Hanny also admit this when recounted Alice's story and Steph, well you pretty much freaked when i told you.

But when it comes down to facts, I have yet to be accepted by ADFA so i am not moving to Canberra yet. But if i do get accepted and offered a position, make no mistake i will take it up without a second thought. So please do not tell me to not go to Canberra, don't make it any harder than it has to be for me. If you have to say anything, support me. Say please dont die. Please take care. Say we will always be here for you.

There is a very good reason why i want to go to ADFA so badly. Other than the obvious financial reasons. There has always beeen prejudice against me for as long as i can remember. If i move to Canberra, this is my chance to start over, to make a fresh start. I can't keep going on with all this passive hatred against me, ive suffered 12 years of it already. So dont ask me to stay cause i wont, dont ask me not to go cause i will. If i am going to stay, it will have to be just more than because of you. While you are important to me, i cant stay just because of that. So please dont ask me to.